My Playoff Picks!

It's that time of year again, for the next month or two it's pretty much guaranteed I'll be in front of the television watching CBC and/or TSN for the 2010 edition of the NHL playoffs. I don't have time to give my full analysis of each series because I'm watching some games right now, so to be brief, here's my picks for the first round.

EASTERN CONFERENCE
Washington (1) vs Montreal (8)
Doesn't look good for the Habs, but goaltending is key. Could be a blowup, but who knows? Still I can't see the Caps losing this series.
Washington in 6

New Jersey (2) vs Philadelphia (7)
Despite being #2 and 7 seed's, this series will be close. Regardless, if Philly is considered the underdog this will be an upset. Sorry Marty!
Philadelphia in 7

Buffalo (3) vs Boston (6)
What happened to the Bruins this year? Contenders last year, pretenders this year. Complete reverse for the Sabres, who are back in the playoffs. Should be low scoring and probably a snoozer. Without Savard, Boston may never score on Miller.
Buffalo in 5

Pittsburgh (4) vs Ottawa (5)
A surprisingly good season for the Sens, it's too bad they have to play the defending Cup champs for the first round. The Pens have been inconsistent this year, but will find their game at some point during round one...?
Pittsburgh in 6

WESTERN CONFERENCE
San Jose (1) vs Colorado (8)
As usual the Sharks have cruised at the top of the standings. A completely revamped line-up (except for the keys) hold promise of a Cup, but if recent playoff history matters, they are ripe for an upset. The Avs only has a few names I still recognize, there's no way they'll beat the top seed...or will they?
Colorado in 7

Chicago (2) vs Nashville (7)
I love the Hawks, always have and always will. The Hawks had one of their best regular seasons ever. So, this is easy, the Hawks WILL be in the Cup finals!
Chicago in 5

Vancouver (3) vs L.A. (6)
Never really sure about the Canucks, they have a history of underachieving, but this year the team has more depth than ever (in recent memory). I know next to nothing about the Kings.
Vancouver in 5

Phoenix (4) vs Detroit (5)
The Coyotes were the feel-good story this year and their first appearance in the playoffs in what...8 years or something? These ex-Jets have the unfortunate pleasure of meeting the hottest team in the second half of the season. This will be a close series, but in some ways it will be an upset no matter who wins.
Detroit in 7

Stuff I See Outside My Window (At Work)

Anyone have any idea what's with this?

Seems to be a car covered in sticky-notes, but why? Is it some sort of advertising? Is it an April Fool's joke? Does it say something? Is it art?...Or is it just someone trying to bring a smile to everyone's face?

Whatever it is, it sure got everyone's attention at the stop light...and it brought a smile to my face! Happy April!

What I Bought On eBay.

This is probably old news if you live in my household, but I bought a piece of art last month on eBay. As you might know already, I'm a big comic book/cartoon collector and any time I have a chance to purchase something new and possibly unique, I'll do it, within my budget...of course.

This is an original editorial cartoon from the Omaha World Herald in 1994, by Jeff Koterba. I actually won the bidding back in early February so I thought the timing was good because it was a few days before the start of the Winter Olympics in Vancouver. Earlier that week, the local paper ran a piece on the "Worst scandals in Winter Olympic history. The #1 scandal was the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan incident when Kerrigan was attacked and injured by a baton-wielding man. It turned out the assailant was hired by Harding's ex-husband and current body guard of Harding, who was one of Kerrigan's teammates on the U.S. figure skating team. The upcoming Winter Olympics and this (event-appropriate) cartoon, I had to have it!

The art work is a pen and ink piece complete with some white-out and pencil marks, that make it all the more authentic. It seemed funny at the time and my kids still don't get the humour in this strip, so I guess you had to be there. Anyways, check out Jeff's site for more great strips and I'll be on the look out for his memoir, Inklings.

Hey Burt, This Is Unacceptable!

Sometimes I feel invisible, maybe I am? There are so many instances that make me wonder, waiting in line at stores being ignored for people behind me that have been there a lot less time than I have. At the old Long & McQuade location, many times I would standing at the front counter for 10-20 minutes waiting to pay for a set of strings or to get any kind of customer service (rentals etc.), usually to be ignored for one of their "buddies" or some older long-haired wanna-be musician that was louder and demanded more attention than myself. I always swore that when I became famous or at least a well-known musician, I would strut back to L & M and fuck- 'em up somehow, maybe snub them if they tried to suck up to me only because I was a "celeb" or I would let loose on the employees for being such rude pricks...it still pisses me off!

Another time at another pseudo-macho store, McDermot Lumber, I was waiting behind several people at the customer service line, I waited like any other normal line-waiting person and when it was my turn to ask for help, some jerk barges in front of me from nowhere to place an order. Of course, the gutless store employee ignores me and carries on business with, "Mr. aggressive, dressed better and speaks louder than me" all because for some frick'in reason he thinks he has some unspoken privilege and right to be served before me. Am I invisible? What the f***! I admit I was kind of a jerk myself, when he walked past me I may have stuck out a leg, I guess it's just a relax or something, and when he stumbled he gave me this look and asked, "what's your problem?". If I had any guts (I really am trying to control my anger management), I would have explained it to him how rude it is to cut in line (or punched him in the face), but instead I just mumbled and turned away.

I can't count the amount of times I've been to a restaurant when they've forgotten or gave me the wrong order, not anyone else at the table, just me. The times my order at Burger King excluded the fries I ordered or when Subway mysteriously has forgotten the bacon on my Turkey and Bacon sub, I'm paying an extra two bucks for a couple of shriveled up pieces of bacon. Is it because I don't speak up and cause a fuss and I easily let people treat me like shit?

The latest episode was at the local Salisbury House last Friday night. After playing Friday night hockey, me and 3 friends regularly go to Sal's for a late night burger and fries, usually after midnight. We've become such regulars, the waitresses knows our order, a Mr. Big Nip platter (burger, lettuce, fried onions, tomato, Cole slaw and fries) and a drink. This time I had to pick up someone before meeting the guys there, so I asked if they could order me "the usual". When I arrived it was about 12:30 am, they had ordered and I asked for a root beer to go with my burger platter. About 5 minutes later the other 3 guys got their food and they started to eat. Maybe 10 minutes later the waitress came around to give drink refills, I reminded her about my order and she said my order was coming up and that mine was delayed because she had to serve some other tables (whatever that means?). It was probably another 25 minutes later when she brings me a regular burger (patty and onions) with fries, clearly not what I ordered. I overheard the waitress asking the cook when her regular burger and fries order was ready for some teenage guy sitting at the counter with a group of friends (that had arrived at the restaurant much later than I had). I walked over with the plate I was just served and handed it to the waitress and said, "this must be his order", she took it to me and dropped it in front of the confused kid. Somehow my order got missed, that happens. I reminder her what I ordered, sat down and waited. By this time the other guys were almost finished their meals, leaving most of their fries because they had clearly been over deep fried, hard, burnt, dry, hollow, lacking any potato content at all. Eventually a different waiter comes by our table and says our waitress is on break and "what did you order again?", this was really becoming a joke. I told him I have to "take it to go" because I didn't want to sit alone and eat because the other guys were anxious to leave. The food finally came, now it was 1:30am (a full hour since I arrived), and I took my Styrofoam container to the cash counter and we waited to pay. I paid my bill (11 bucks and change and obviously no tip), not even a hint of an apology or a discount for wasting an hour sitting in their restaurant just to take home my food. One of the guys commented, there's no way I should have to pay, but then added that the young people working there don't have a clue about customer service or how to make things right. I'm betting if I loudly expressed my displeasure and screamed at the staff, I might have gotten their attention, but maybe not. I didn't once raise my voice, I never said anything in a sarcastic tone, nor did I question why I never got served. To top things off when I brought the food home, the burger meat was under-cooked and pink and the fries were barely cooked, yellow soggy and raw potato tasting...yuck!
The point is, you won't get anything in this world if you don't speak up for yourself. If that means bitching, whining, complaining, embarrassing, humiliating, harassing and degrading the employees to get their attention, is this what it's come to? As an employee at a retail store, I personally hate when customers employ the above tactics to complain or to get a bigger discount, it's effective to get attention (especially to your boss and other customers in the store), but the lack of respect and arrogance is inexcusable. Some customers do this to try to goat you into a reaction that will put the situation in their corner. Generally common courtesy and respect should be enough to get your point across and you shouldn't have to resort to being a jerk. I don't want to be a jerk to the employees at Sal's, but this is unacceptable, are you listening Burt!!
...but maybe I really am invisible?

Refreshing My Batteries

I used to hate winter, it was cold, harsh and gloomy. Sludging through knee deep snow, sliding on the ice and feeling the Summer will never come. I've never gone away in the winter to a warmer place, instead opting to tolerate the quarter season of deep freeze.

For the past four winter's my wife and I have embraced the season and enjoyed the sunny, clear skies of the deep freeze by taking a mini-holiday during February for some rest and relaxation. The first year we went to Elkhorn, a luxury resort (hotel) out near Riding Mountain Provincial Park. It was extremely cold that year, but we tackled the cold weather by renting snowshoes and trudged through the ski trails and explored the park. The lodge itself was pretty much a hotel complete with typical hotel trimmings like a pool/day spa, restaurant, and all the rooms in one complex. The room was equipped with a large flat screen TV, fireplace and in-room whirlpool. It was nice, luxurious, but expensive! (just under $200 a night).

For the last three years we tried something different, Bear Country Cottages. Only an hour drive north of the city (compared to 3 hours north-west to Elkhorn) situated between Grand and Victoria Beaches in Belair, MB. They have individual wood cabins that are either two or three bedrooms and they all feature a stocked kitchen (minus the food), a cozy living room with fireplace and satellite surround-sound TV. The master bedroom has a beautiful spacious whirlpool hot tub that has a large picture window overlooking the treed lot (with an outdoor to view deer...or them viewing you). These cabins are built within the forest, but the outgoing road leads to homes and cottages, which in turn lead to Lake Winnipeg. The past two years when we trekked over to the lake, we discovered there was open water near the shore, despite the freezing cold temperatures (it must be at least 10 degrees colder on the lake!). We managed to gaze out into the white horizon with endless white all around us, except for a couple of ice fishing shacks.
Overall a nice way to spend a couple of days in the middle of the coldest time of the year, did I mention the hot tub? The rates at the Bear are very reasonable, $125 Sun-Thurs and $140 on the weekend/per night. This year was great, sitting in the tub watching the Olympics over the sound of bubbling jets sipping on our favourite beverages and enjoying a few days away from the big city, computers and the reality of winter. If only it could be this good every year!

Early Spring Is On the Way!!...According To The Sockpuppet

Manitoba's groundhog of choice, Manitoba Merv did not see his shadow this morning, so according to some weird screwed-up superstition it means we will have an early Spring. I'm not sure if this is based on logic or science, but I'm pretty sure a "sockpuppet" can't really forecast the future, but maybe the guy attached to the hand under the puppethead buried under the snow knows something we don't know.

Time to put away the shovel...if not, blame the puppet!

Hopper- 1999-2010

He was a good rabbit and he lived a long and happy life. The soft fuzzy guy will be greatly missed, the nuzzles on the toes, his mid-air hops and his lounging around on the living room floor. There will never be another bunny, like Hopper...R.I.P.

Patrice Cormier Suspended For The Rest Of The Season

Judge for yourself, do you think the suspension justified the actions? The QMJHL suspended Cormier for the balance of the regular season and the playoffs, but his team the Rouyn-Noranda Huskies are appealing the sentence.

The Quebec Major Junior Hockey League’s Rouyn-Noranda Huskies announced Tuesday they are appealing the season-long suspension of forward Patrice Cormier.

Cormier was banned for the rest of the QMJHL regular season plus the playoffs for elbowing Quebec Remparts defenceman Mikael Tam in the head.

Huskies general manager Andre Tourigny said Cormier’s elbow was “unfortunate,” but stressed the league went too far in their punishment.

“We were fully aware that the gesture had to be severely sanctioned. According to us, the sanction delivered by the QMJHL (Monday) is not severe . . . it is excessive,” Tourigny told a news conference in Rouyn-Noranda in Quebec’s Abitibi region.

Dozens of Huskies fans who packed the room where the news conference was held burst into applause when Tourigny said his team is going to fight the decision.

In a move to curb excessive violence, the QMJHL handed out one of its most severe sanctions in history Monday by banning Cormier from playing until his team is eliminated from the playoffs.

One of the things that bugs me is that next year he will more than likely turn pro and suit up with the New Jersey Devils or their AHL affiliate. He will sign a seven figure pro contract and continue on with his career unscathed and more than likely will cheap shot another player. His elbow to Anton Rodin of Sweden and Teemu Hartikainen of Finland during pre-competition games during the World Junior Championships last month, proves this guy has a history. Just think, if Canada had won the gold, it would have been team captain Cormier that would have hoisted the cup. This guy's an embarrassment to the country and to the game. His Suspension should have been longer!

What do you think?

Here's Our Team!

Hockey Canada executives unveiled Canada's roster for men's hockey for the 2010 Winter Olympics. Steve Yzerman announced the team Wednesday, let the complaining, criticizing and whining begin. Every team has it's critics and this team is no exception, but the appointing of Scott Neidermayer as captain and Chris Pronger, Jerome Iginla and Sidney Crosby as alternatives was a no brainer.

• G Martin Brodeur (NHL)
• G Roberto Luongo (NHL)
• G Marc-Andre Fleury (NHL)
• D Chris Pronger (A) (NHL)
• D Shea Weber (NHL)
• D Brent Seabrook (NHL)
• D Scott Niedermayer (C) (NHL)
• D Dan Boyle (NHL)
• D Drew Doughty (NHL)
• D Duncan Keith (NHL)
• F Sidney Crosby (A) (NHL
• F Jarome Iginla (A) (NHL)
• FJonathan Toews (NHL)
• F Rick Nash (NHL)
• F Eric Staal (NHL)
• F Mike Richards (NHL)
• F Brenden Morrow (NHL)
• F Dany Heatley (NHL)
• F Joe Thornton (NHL)
• F Ryan Getzlaf (NHL)
• F Patrick Marleau (NHL)
• F Corey Perry (NHL)
• F Patrice Bergeron (NHL)

The only player I really question is the inclusion of Patrice Bergeron instead of, Brad Richards, Martin St. Louis or Mike Green. I noticed a third of the players play on a NHL team from the state of California. Let me know who you think should/shouldn't be on the team.

Advanced D'n'D- The Vampire Strikes Back!

If you're getting bored of playing with your Christmas toys or just need a break from Boxing week sales, drop by the Gas Station Theatre for a two night run of Advanced D'n'D- The Vampire Strikes Back, starting tonight. This special holiday campaign will cost you a mere $12 a night or $20 for both nights. This campaign continues with most of it's ensemble cast from the Fringe run last July, as well as the two night run in October.

Good news for fans of the D'n'D series, the 2010 Fringe Festival lottery took place a few weeks back and D'n'D will be this Summer, stay tuned!

For more details about this show and a recap of past episodes, check out their website, Advanced D'n'D.

Worst Quote Of The Year...So Far

"She was screaming at me to help get her baby out of the toilet. I didn't know what to do," Keith said, quietly. "I just walked away."

"I just walked away"...this was the story from a week ago about the Winnipeg woman who gave birth in her toilet because she didn't know she was pregnant. Her 15 year old cousin, Keith Richard heard her screams and rushed into the washroom and found her crouched over...and he just walked away, some real family spirit in that family! The real Keith Richard(s) would never turn his back on a baby!

The new mother, Heather Richard pipes in with an equally inspiring quote, "I thought I had to crap," she says. "I could feel something hard in my belly. I thought, 'Oh my God that's a big crap.' "I thought, 'What the (expletive).' I didn't know it was a baby. I thought it was my intestines".

That crap turned out to be her newborn son. It's a good thing the cops happened to be at the house to arrest her on an outstanding warrant, otherwise because of Keith's (non-) help, the baby would have died. In a follow-up article in the Winnipeg Free Press, the mother vows... "We'll Make It", which of course should inspire the nation (and all parents that should not be parents) to stand up and vow to be good responsible parents. Let's hope for the kid's sake he's not treated like crap.

Photo Of The Year...So Far!

There's not much more to say, I think the smile says it all. Have a nice day Mike Kelly, good luck with your job search and way to keep your coaching options open. I'm sure the CFL has not seen the last of Mike Kelly, since the league seems to be lax to ex (and present-day) criminals. LOL!
(Read more in the Randy Turner's Free Press column)

Jay Em - Leath L. Payne Live Debut

Jay Em - Leath L. Payne made their triumphant live debut this past Sunday at J. Foxs Freestyle Comedy Night. This local pseudo-gangsta-rap duo were the surprise hit of the evening performing 3 songs and providing more laughs than the actual comedy acts that pre- and proceeded them.

The first act of the evening was a new improv duo, 1 Foot 1, named because James Van Niekerk is one foot, one inch taller than partner Caitlin Curtis, clever...eh? I know improv isn't always about laughs and good story lines, but this performance provided little or no laughs and had more awkward pauses than a...ah..ah...? In improv, especially for duos, chemistry is a top priority and unfortunately there didn't seem to be a lot. Caitlin tried very hard to rescue scenes, but the lack of a compatible skill level made it difficult...and it dragged on a little too long. Maybe next time.

The other Improv troupe ("the best part...", the headliners) is the core cast of the Micro Theatre Company. The cast is made up of Liam Schumacher, Caitlin Curtis, Lucas Conway, Kya Dimaline and Erik Berg. They had their moments and despite the young age of most of the group, their experience as improver's was evident. They incorporated some weird kind of style where the members that weren't in the scene were actively writing short monologues (this style is called "Ghost Jail") that were read aloud on stage and was used as inspiration for the next scene. As I said, this was all hit and miss, but with more hits.

Squeezed in between was the highlight of the night, Jay Em - Leath L. Payne, whose identities have been shroud in mystery before this evening. What worked in their favour was that most people in the audience didn't know what to expect. Close friends have probably heard some of the songs on their MySpace page, but the question whether they would be able to reproduce their sound on stage was a challenge. Jay Em sampled their beats and music from a laptop on stage (all the music was originally recorded by both musicians), but all the vocals were live. Their music and lyrics were so over the top and a dead-on parody of this stupid genre, that you almost thought they were serious. The over-use of that annoying "auto-tune" was ridiculously funny. Songs with subject matter such as bullying, girls that like to be treated badly and religion are given an insensitive politically incorrect treatment that was laugh out loud hilarious. Hopefully next time they'll be given more time so they can perform a larger repertoire of soon to be anthems.

Here is the live recording from Jay Em-Leath L. Payne's set. It is also available on their MySpace page as well as the studio versions of these and other songs.

JAY EM-LEATH L. PAYNE
J. Foxs, Winnipeg, MB
December 6, 2009
1. Bullies
2. Mr. Jerk
3. Re: Demshun

Thank You Sean Lucas!

The supposed "13th man" on the final play of the 2009 Grey Cup was identified on television reports as all-star linebacker Sean Lucas, who was on the field for the first field goal attempt and not during the second and final attempt. The too-many men on the field call cost the Roughriders the Cup, but all the blame shouldn't be on one player. The coaches on the sidelines and upstairs in the spotting booth are ultimately responsible for who's on and not on the field, though each player should know which situation their responsible for. In hockey, the team is assessed a bench minor for too-many men on the ice and it's the coach that's blamed for that goof, ask Don Cherry.

Anyways, thank you Roughriders for your costly mistake. That mistake won my wife $1000 in a football pool when her ticket score matched the final score of 28-27 East! When Duval missed the first field goal attempt our hearts sank, but when we saw the flags thrown, we knew the money was back on the table.

Just In Case You're Wondering...

...An update from two recent posts, yes, the mess is gone and no, I didn't go. I refer to two recent posts, the first one where I agonized about attending my high school reunion and the other about people dumping garbage on the roads etc.

I probably blew my only opportunity to see old class mates, but I couldn't be bothered. It's too easy to avoid or ignore things if people don't whine or pester you to do something, remember kids thank your parents or friends (if you have any) who make you do things you might otherwise not do. If these people weren't around to act as your conscience you might not have bothered going to school, take music lessons, get pets, talk to girls (or anyone!) or get a job. It's important to listen to the advice of others, but sometimes it's easier to not do anything than to make your life miserable thinking about.

I know there are bigger problems in this world, so I'll be brief, the pile of wood that fell off the pick-up truck was eventually cleaned up. I don't who did it, the city or a fine upstanding citizen, but whoever did, Fort Garry and Pembina Highway thanks you. If you're wondering why I didn't clean up the mess, good question, but you wouldn't see Gordon Sinclair out there picking-up debris from the road...or would you?

The Adventure Continues...!

If you attended the 2009's Fringe festival's hit, Advanced D'n'D The Next Campaign, you'll be delighted to know the adventure continues with Advanced D'n'D: The Unfinished Campaign. The quest continues on October 25th and 26th, 8:00pm at the Gas Station Theatre. Tickets are $8 for students and $10 for adults and this adventure will continue over two days, so I would assume it would be essential to go both nights or it might not make much sense.